To you…at 20 weeks.

20 Weeks. The halfway mark. I can’t believe this date is actually here. I know this is a landmark point in a pregnancy but for some reason, it’s hitting me especially hard.

To be honest, with the exception of the extreme exhaustion I felt in the first trimester, I’ve really enjoyed being pregnant. While I stare longingly at photos of my previous shape, I’ve enjoyed watching my belly grow knowing that it symbolizes the growth you’re undergoing each and every day. I mean, you’re already the length of a carrot. How the hell did that happen so quickly?

And while I’m beyond thrilled by the thought of actually meeting you and holding you in my arms for the first time and the 8 million times after that, I’m also a little nervous that this pregnancy will be over before I know it. Who knows what the future holds for our little family but for now we’re planning on to adopt your baby brother or sister so there’s a chance I won’t get to experience pregnancy again. That’s why I’m trying to cherish every single moment of this journey with you.

I’m still growing and for now, I’m happy to report the weight is going straight to my belly. I haven’t noticed too much of a change to the rest of my body yet and I’m managing to squeeze into my regular pants – unbuttoned, of course, thanks to the bella band – although I will admit, maternity pants are way more comfortable.

This week has been great, albeit very very busy. I’m approaching the end of my long spree of working weekends and got a long overdue taste of freedom on Sunday. I woke up and realized for the first time in weeks, that I had absolutely nothing to do for the next 24 hours. It was awesome! Your dad has continued to be a superstar week after week. He’s helping around the house – even more than he normally does – and doing an amazing job trying to become Lola’s go-to companion – although both she and I are resisting the change a little.

He also surprised me by buying you your very first pair of shoes. And let me say, they are adorable! He was smart enough to pick out the exact pair of Toms I would’ve gotten you as well – I’m a firm believer that just because you’re a girl you don’t have to wear sparkly pink everything. Girls can totally rock blue as well and look damn cute doing it.

Considering how much I’ve been on the go, you’d think I’d be feeling pretty wiped out and over-tired. But, so far, you’ve been really kind to me and I’m feeling great. As far as I’m concerned, you and I have got a really good thing going. I love, love, love being with you 24 hours a day and I’m really enjoying this bonding time together.

Love you beyond words, little one.

Your mama

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